Wednesday, January 13

I don't wanna!

This is going to be a whiney post, so feel free to skip it. Seriously, whiney. I have a 2-year old at home - I know whiney. And this is going to be whiney.

I want restriction. I am not just hitting the wall with my dieting. I splatted against the wall like a fly. I am done. Done. Done. Done. As in not rare or even medium. But well, well done.

I was hanging on by a thread until yesterday, and all hell just broke loose. I am not surprised - 6 or 7 weeks is about how long I usually make it. And hmmm, oh, yeah, today is 7 weeks.

I won't go into details so as to not send your salivary glands into overdrive. But let's just say that last night's dessert (which I indulged in) might have found its way onto this morning's breakfast plate. Ok, the remains are in the garbage, and I shall repent at lunch.

Mentally, I keep falling into 'last supper' mode. I know once I get restriction, several things are going to be off limits, most likely. And mentally, I want them before my fill next Friday. However, I will get back on track right now and not let the madness continue.

Is it next Friday yet?

4 comments:

  1. This is exactly how I feel - I am so with ya sister except I hit the wall at 4 weeks!!

    I ate one bite here, one bite there of this dessert I had bought for my guests (that they didn't eat - damn them!). It should be illegal in at least 48 states ;)

    Hang in there!

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  2. I understand. So much!! I have been fighting "last supper" mode for weeks. I was shocked at how hard it hit right before my first fill (and before the second).

    I knew about bandster hell, but I really didn't plan on "dieting" for months.. *whine* I don't know but I expected to feel something from the first couple fills (now at 6ccs) and I did for maybe a day or two. Now NOTHING! Plus I have been losing and gaining the same 2lbs all month *whine* *whine*

    But, it will be over soon!!!!! We will look back and this and it will seem all a blur - just like the preop is starting to be. I keep telling myself that and it does help. I also make sure all the "bad" stuff stays out of my house. Otherwise it just makes it too hard. Way way too hard. Plus I drink a TON!

    One thing I did find that helps was to get a few yummy healthy subsitute snacks. My favorite is the 100 calorie ice cream sandwich. It isn't a good band food - which doesn't really matter since I don't have restriction, but it helped with the desires to have another sweet desert. I also have used sugar free pudding and mixed cool whip in it to get a easy mousse.

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  3. Ugh, sorry to hear it's so tough right now. Hang in there. Only nine more sleeps till next Friday.

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