I felt normal.

I think writing this post is going to make me cry. Oops, here come the tears. Today was the first time I realized that I am a totally normal weight by US standards. I realize I am still fat by 'normal' standards, but it's not the type of fat that prohibits me from doing what I want to do.

I took my kids to a waterpark today with 3 other moms and their kids. They have only known me since I moved to FL, so they've known me since about 290 lbs (I'm now 249 lbs). Which is heavy, but not 374 lbs heavy. Anyhow, we walked up millions of steps, I carried a kid on my shoulders with another on my hip, I crawled through water tunnels, I went down water slides, I swam and ran and chased kids and walked around in my bathing suit for four hours without ever once thinking about it. I didn't dread the steps, I didn't dread the tunnels, I wasn't afraid of weight limits on anything. It was worth every second of this journey. My kids had so much fun, and so did I!

It wasn't until I got home that I realized I had no problem keeping up with the other moms. Not to mention, they are all younger than me, each only had one toddler to chase, and we stayed about an hour longer than any of them! I rocked that waterpark!

The only bummer is my legs look A-to-the-W-to-the-FUL. Seriously. My thighs were horrible when I was really heavy - tons of cellulite and super lumpy/bumpy. Now they are still full of cellulite and lumps, but they also have saggy skin and look a bit like a melted candle collided with elephant skin. Not attractive. At all. Absolutely my worst body part. I almost wanted to make a sign for my back that said, "Don't mind the legs, I've lost 125 lbs!"

In other news, I lost 1.6 lbs this week for a total of 14.4 lbs (I think) in 3 weeks of low carb. DH lost a lb (hahahahaha) for a total of 21 lbs in 3 weeks. He was whining (hahahahaha again) about only losing one pound.

I finished day 9 of shredding today. I soooo did not want to do it last night, but I did and am glad I did. Tomorrow is the last day of level 1! WOOHOO!

The pizza turned out pretty good. I'll type out the recipe tomorrow. We had Chinese chicken lettuce wraps last night and taco salads tonight. Can't say I'm bored with the low carb choices with everything we've eaten. I think I'm going to make crab cakes for tomorrow. Or shrimp scampi. YUM!

OK, off to read my book. I've got four going, but "The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks" really is good and I'm anxious to read more. Toodles!

Good Band News for All of Us!

I soooo forgot to tell you guys this. After the freak out a few weeks ago about that Belgian study (or wherever it was from) about how like only 10% of bands are problem-free or some other BS, I was a tad freaked out. Remember that?

I went to support group a few weeks ago and asked the leader about that news story. She's been an RN in the surgeon's office for four years. She said in that time, they've had ONE slip. ONE. No removals. And she couldn't remember for sure if she'd even seen a dilated pouch, but she said if she had, it was maybe one or two.

Four years, thousands of patients, and virtually no problems. Granted, this practice is pretty disciplined with its patients, and they are very good with follow-through with their patients, but still, isn't that good news?!

Workout blues and another virgin alert.

Frickin A. I have worked out six days in a row and guess what's happened to my weight loss? Yep. Stall. I know, I know, I know. I know what advice I'd give someone else, but seriously, I don't like it. Make it stop. I better lose 5 lbs overnight, or DH is going to weigh even less than me. Wahhhh. Not fair. Muscles are totally overrated. (Not really, just whining.)

Likewise, I think I'm eating too little. I've had this problem in the past, and I find it so ironic. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to shove my piehole full of sugar and carbs, but I have no appetite for anything Atkins-legal. Not that I don't like the food (I do), I just am not hungry. It's an interesting conundrum for a fat girl, to say the least.

As for the virgin alert, I tried my first CLICK shake today, and I feel the love. Boy oh boy, was it tasty. A tad expensive and a tad high in carbs (12 per serving), but YUMMO! Honestly, almost as good as a frappucino. Definitely better than the nasty light frappucinos. I added a bit of heavy cream to mine, and I enjoyed every sip of it.

On the menu for dinner is low carb pizza. I made a crust of eggs and a bunch of different cheeses. If it turns out good, I'll share, as it may be easier to eat for us bandsters. I hope it's good, or I may have to have a second CLICK shake for dinner. Ha.

Well, guess I have nothing else to bore you guys with today. Off to make some returns at Target and buy some hand weights. I've been working out with sugar-free Davinci syrup bottles. Yep, I'm cool like that.

It's a bullet-type day.

• One of the icky side effects of low-carb is dry mouth. Ugh, I am so stinkin' thirsty all the time. I can't remember if or when it does away, but I hope it's soon.
• One of the good side effects of low-carb is (TMI) no gas. I am such a gassy person (yes, TMI), and I swear, it's sugar that causes it in me. It's nice to not constantly feel like a pin would pop me!
• DH is having a hell of a time dealing with doctors and orders being taken care of and all that. He's so frustrated, and while I understand, he seems to think this has never happened to anyone else and that he is special. I've tried to explain to him that this stuff happens to everyone dealing with medical stuff.
• Speaking of DH, he is in tremendous pain, and while I understand (again), he has GOT to find a way to deal better, or I am going to kill him. He sits with his leg straight out in front of him, no brace, and then yells at the kids when they trip over his leg. Well, what do you expect when it's sticking out like that?! And then it happens again 5 min later, and well, duh, yes, you didn't move it and it happened again. I don't find that all that shocking.
• I begrudgingly did day 5 of shredding yesterday. I forgot to do it in the AM. By the time we got home at 9:30 pm last night, I was wiped. I sooooo wanted to skip, but I didn't, and I really did feel energized when I finished.
• Have some soup in the crockpot, made with leftovers from yesterday - ham, steamed broccoli/cauliflower/carrots, and chicken stock. Later on, I'll add cheese and cream to make it tasty! Hope it turns out good.
• It's just kind of rainy and dreary today, and I'm just feeling here. Not blah, not unhappy. Just kinda here.
• And last but not least, a pic of my kiddos from yesterday. Aren't they the cutest?!

Low Carb Dinner Ideas

Here's the list of my low carb dinners I promised to share. To be perfectly honest, my meals haven't changed drastically doing low carb, as I couldn't eat the typical dinner starches anyhow. It's my snacks, specifically the sugary ones, that I've had to cut out. It's not been hard so far, although I know I'm still in the honeymoon phase. The good news is with the band, I feel like I can have some sugar now and again without causing too many problems, because I ultimately cannot eat that much anyhow.

So, anyhow, here are my dinners from the last 2+ weeks. Breakfast is usually coffee with heavy cream and/or a protein shake. Lunch is usually leftovers, egg salad, bacon (I know, weird, but I can always eat bacon without problems), or soup.

1. Chicken in Garlic Cream Sauce
Cauli-rice
Garlicky Green Beans
Romaine Salad w. blue cheese & onion

2 Cilantro Lime Shrimp Tacos
Mexican Spinach Casserole
Romaine salad w. cheese & onion

3. Pizza Parmigian Patties (italian sausage, pepperoni, onions, garlic, parm cheese, and egg made into patties, cooked in tomato sauce and topped with provolone)
Buttered green beans
Romaine salad w. cheese, onion, & pepperoni

4. Bunless McDouble
Side salad

5. Hot dogs w. melted cheese
Pepper poppers
Side salad

6. Coney Island Chili Dog Pie
Roasted Brussel Sprouts
Romaine salad w. cheese & onion (can you tell I bought the big thing of romaine from Costco?!)

7. Cream of Mushroom Soup

8. Makhani chicken
Cauli-Rice
Grilled asparagus

9. Bratwurst cooked in buttery onions
Garlic green beans
Salad

10. Smothered burgers (grilled onions, bacon, and provolone and american cheeses)
Salad

11. Gyro Salad (spinach, homemade gyro meat, onions, tomatoes, feta cheese, and tzatziki)

12. Spinach Salad with hot bacon dressing and poached eggs

13. Pork cube steaks in garlic-mustard sauce
Cauli-rice
Spinach salad

14. Crab legs with butter
Roasted broccoli

15. Homemade low-carb sloppy joes
Cole slaw

16. Filet mignon medallions with goat cheese
Sauteed spinach
(this was at House of Blues)

Coming up this week, I'm thinking we'll be having chinese chicken lettuce wraps, crab cakes, taco salads, pizza, and something with pork tenderloin, most likely this recipe that I've made before and we love. Obviously, I'll need another meal or two, although there's a lot of pork tenderloin, so I'll probably come up with a second meal to use it up.

Hope this gives you some ideas!

VIRGIN ALERT! VIRGIN ALERT!

I am officially in virgin fat territory! In case you don't know what that is, that is a weight you've not been for a long, long, long time (whatever you determine that time to be). For me, of course, I was at 249.6 (or maybe .8) in September, and then I maintained/gained for several months. But before that, the last time I was at 249.2 lbs was probably sometime in 2003, so eight or so years. HOLY COW! Eight freakin' years.

I just finished day 3 of Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred. It's a good workout for 20 min. I feel accomplished but not dead at the end. I had two realizations today while doing it:

1. My tummy (I refuse to call it an apron - ugh!) is really impeding my workout. It's gross, but it flops so hard, it hurts. Jumping jacks are the worst. And then Jillian starts in on how there's no modified move for jumping jacks, because even her 400 lb clients can do it. And then I feel bad. And then I realized I can mute her, so I did, and worked out to my iPod instead. Anyhow, I should probably get a doctor and start documenting this in hopes of getting plastic surgery covered by insurance in the future.

2. While the workout is difficult, I found myself wondering why it wasn't harder. That's when I realized, it's not nearly so bad to start a workout regime when you don't weigh 350+ lbs. Seriously! Don't get me wrong, I'm huffing and puffing, but I can get up and off the floor with minimal effort, I can keep up with the video, and I am feeling good. What an NSV!

So, on a totally crappy note, DH tore his ACL and meniscus at work on Tuesday. Suckity suck suck suck. I feel bad for him, but to be totally honest, I'm having a giant pity party for myself. It's not like he helps much, but now he's zero help plus he's a completely horrible patient. He keeps whining about how no one knows how much it hurts and how it's the worst pain in the world. Too bad he's used that phrase for about four or five other injuries he's had, so it's kinda like the little boy who cried wolf. Anyhow, my pity party is also because there's a chance we'll be moving in two months (our lease is up and we're undecided about what we're doing), and so help me, if he's not ready to help move, there will be hell to pay, since I pretty much single-handedly got us moved down here. If you recall my whining. I don't want to do it again. Sigh.

We've got two very busy days ahead, so I'll check in when I can! Toodles!

How Amy Got Her Groove Back

Yep, my friends, I am starting to feel my groove! I love it!!!!! Two weeks on Atkins, 13 lbs down, and 1 lb away from my lowest. I am enjoying low carb, I'm enjoying cooking again, I'm at good restriction. Now I just need to add in exercise (I'm starting Jillian Michael's 30-day Shred today -pray for me), and that's how Amy got her groove back.

I know you're all anxious to hear about the weigh-in this morning. I did indeed lose. I hate losing. Oh, wait, I mean I lost the competition with DH, but I also lost weight, which I do not hate. Of course.

3.4 lbs down for a total of 13 lbs in two weeks on low carb.

DH is down 20.5 lbs in two weeks on low carb.

Jerk.

I guess I still love him. But I do love him more when I am skinnier than him.

When I have a chance later, I'll share my dinners from the last two weeks in case anyone is interested in trying Atkins and is intimidated by it. It's really not bad, I promise!

Off to entertain my kids before I have to lock them in their rooms, because they're driving me nuts. Nuts, I say!

Spinach Salad with Hot Bacon Dressing and Poached Eggs

Oh my, was dinner tasty and easy. And low carb! This is definitely going in my regular rotation. Delicious wilty spinach with salty bacon and creamy eggs. How could you go wrong?! I mean, everything is better with bacon.

Spinach Salad with Hot Bacon Dressing and Poached Eggs
(This is written for one serving)

2 c. baby spinach
3 slices bacon
2 eggs, poached
2 T. vinegar
2 T. splenda
Other vegetables (onions, mushrooms, tomatoes, whatever you like on your salad)

Fry bacon. Drain bacon on paper towels. Reserve approximately 2-3 T.of bacon grease. With bacon grease warm but not too hot (it'll splatter), add vinegar and splenda. Mix thoroughly.

Arrange spinach and vegetables on plate. Add hot dressing and allow it to wilt spinach slightly. Crumble bacon over the top, and then add the poached eggs.

Enjoy!

Never a dull moment.

Seriously, I feel like I go-go-go, and I get busier and busier....

Been photographing my little heart out (really trying to get a business going). Tweaked my knee somehow and it really hurts. Actually, I tweaked it a few weeks ago and it's getting worse instead of better. I hate admitting that. I was going to start the SHRED tomorrow. Babysat a friend's 1-year old overnight. I am dragging. Today is the last day of our first two weeks on Atkins. Honestly, it's not been bad at all. A few cravings that were killed with a cup of coffee nicely laced with splenda and heavy cream. Quite decadent. Mostly I want to crunch on something which I recognize is head hunger and not real hunger.

Bro and sis-in-law arrive for the long weekend tomorrow. All kinds of Easter festivities going on. DH's birthday is Friday (he already got his present - a Droid X).

Tomorrow is our weigh-in, and I'm 95% sure DH did better than me again. Not because I've cheated or not been diligent. Simply because he has a penis. But I'm not really complaining, because I feel good, and I know the scale is going to be down, and ultimately, that's what it is all about.

I wish I had something fun and exciting and insightful to share, but I don't. I am just kinda living and doing and trying to be productive, and the band/Atkins is kind of secondary, which is a good thing for my real life, but doesn't make for an exciting blog!

My baby is TWO!

My sweet and stubborn and sassy and temperamental and completely adorable and little-guy-who-has-my-heart turned TWO yesterday!

And no, I did not indulge in a cupcake. YEAH ME!

Day 11 of Atkins here. I haven't weighed myself yet this week. Figured I'd try to stay off the scale for a week.  Not sure I can do it. It's amazing how when I'm diligent with my eating, I can't stay off the scale, but when I'm slacking, I can't convince myself to go anywhere hear the scale!

Nothing much else is going on. The kids and I are hanging out today while DH works. We were going to go to a kids' festival, but life is about to get crazy and it's supposed to be 90+ today, so I think we'll skip it. Tomorrow, I'm taking pictures of a friend's family, and then they are staying and watching the kids so DH and I can go out for a few hours. We really need it. We've just been picking at each other lately. DH has had the "induction flu" since starting Atkins, which is where you feel like crap from cutting the carbs. I have tried to take it easy on him, but the more I back off, the less he does. Honestly, the man has NO responsibilities other than to go to work. I cannot name one thing he does around the house or to contribute to our family on a regular basis. I'm starting to get a tad frustrated to say the least. I think a few hours to relax together will help, since I honestly can't remember the last time we had a chance to go somewhere alone.

Later, gators!

Damn Testosterone!

Is that what makes men lose faster? Whatever it is, IT'S NOT FAIR!

Ok, I actually know DH lost more than me, because his diet was 10x worse than mine was when we started Atkins a week ago. And I'm not disappointed in the least in my weight loss, but still, he lost more than me. Stupid head. I liked weighing less than him.

We lost a 2 year old child between the two of us. I lost 9.6 lbs, and DH lost 16 freakin' lbs!

The battle is on - I will weigh less than him next week.

I know I'm starting to sound like a lowcarb freak or something, and I'm sure it'll get more boring and challenging as we go forward, but it's not been bad. Tonight we're having butter chicken (Indian dish) over cauli-rice with asparagus and probably some raita if I get my butt to the grocery store today. Oh, that's assuming I can eat today, which I think I'll be able to.

Off to clean my entire house. Please pray for me!

Low carb Cream of Mushroom Soup

Easy, peasy and super, duper tasty. Two BIG, BIG thumbs up from me.

Cream of Mushroom Soup

1/2 medium onion - chopped
1/4 cup butter
2 cloves garlic - minced
2 cups chopped mushrooms (I used mini portabellas, as that's what was on sale.)
1 cup chicken stock
2 cups heavy cream
2 egg yolks
Pepper

1. Saute onions in butter until translucent, add garlic and saute until garlic is a bit soft.
2. Add mushrooms and saute until mushrooms are soft.
3. Add chicken stock and simmer for 15-20 minutes, until stock is reduced somewhat.
4. Add cream and bring to a slow boil.
5. Whisk egg yolks in a small bowl, and while whisking, add a ladle of hot soup mixture. Whisk that in and repeat this 2 or 3 times more. This will bring the egg yolks up to soup temperature, so it doesn't make scrambled eggs when you add them to the soup!
6. Allow the soup to simmer for about 10 minutes or so - the eggs will thicken it a bit.
7. Using an immersion blender, blend as much of the soup as you like.
8. Add pepper to taste.

I made the recipe as written, but next time, I will do probably twice as many mushrooms and blend the majority of the soup. It was a little on the thin side for me. I might also add an extra egg yolk.

As written, it's about 7 carbs per serving, and the recipe makes four servings.

I realize it's very calorie-heavy, but it would be easy to lighten up. Less butter (or sub a little olive oil), sub half-n-half or fat-free eval milk for the cream, etc.

Tight as a MoFo

Seriously, my band gets so incredibly tight around TOM. Every month, I have 3-5 days where I struggle with even liquids. I didn't realize how tight I was the other night, and we had McD's for dinner. An hour later, up came my bunless burger along with cold sf lemonade. And it came up so hard, it came out my nose. UGH. It was awful. And then my period showed up. And then it all made sense.

The rest of the month, I am totally happy with my restriction, but man, I have a couple of days where it is almost hard to even drink. Sigh.

On better notes, I made a DELICIOUS cream of mushroom soup today. Low carb and tasty. I'll share the recipe if anyone is interested. It's going down albeit slowly.

And I peeked again - 7.4 lbs gone. In 5 days!

Off to pack up clothes to give to Maria tonight at support group...

I cheated.

But not on my diet!


I cheated by peeking at my scale. I really was going to wait a week, but I just couldn't do it.


4 days on Atkins, and I am down...






Drum roll, please...






6 lbs!

Sweet! So far, it's actually not been too bad. Mostly because it's the band first and foremost that keeps me from eating carby things, not the diet. It's sugar that Atkins is helping me stop eating. And boy oh boy, did I need the help!

Braggy Braggy Post - Photo Time!

You know I love sharing photos, so here are some recent ones...

Isn't she sweet? Reminds me of Shirley Temple!

Sweet Twins!

Such adorable sisters!

Just love the cheesy grins.

Can you say ATTITUDE?!

Love that grin!

He hated being on his belly!

How come double chins are so cute on babies?!

My little ballerina!

I think this is my new favorite picture of DD.

Sweet girl!

Cannot believe he'll be two next week! My little man!

Don't let him fool you - he's a pistol!

My sweeties. 

My daily BAND-width

If you want to be cool like me, hop on over to Tripletmomma's blog and snag her logo for this great project - posting what you eat once in a while, which is what all the cool kids are doing after the Dr. Oz fiasco of SIX TABLESPOONS OF YOGURT for breakfast show.

Thursday
Remember, I am on Atkins Induction right now.

B: Coffee with heavy cream and splenda, two deviled eggs

L: About 7 homemade pepper poppers (mini sweet peppers stuffed with pepperjack and cream cheeses and wrapped in bacon)

S: Cocoa mousse (heavy cream whipped with cocoa and splenda)

D: Cilantro lime shrimp with chunky avocado salsa on top of a romaine salad, mexican spinach casserole

S: Homemade vanilla ice cream (oh, heaven!)


Friday
Still on Atkins


B: Coffee with heavy cream and splenda (nothing else, but simply because I was busy taking pictures)

S: Two slices of muenster cheese

L: Egg drop soup, about 1/2 of a small order of chicken with mushrooms (no rice)

S: Leftover mexican spinach casserole

D: Pizza Parmigiana Patties (bulk italian sausage mixed with chopped onion, garlic, egg, shredded italian cheese, crushed pork rinds, and chopped pepperoni coated in parmesan cheese, cooked in tomato sauce and covered with provolone), garlic green beans, and a romaine salad with onions, italian cheese, and chopped pepperoni

S: Iced coffee with heavy cream, cocoa, and splenda; debating a pepper popper or two

Both days, I've been totally satisfied and most importantly, NOT HUNGRY.

First Low Carb Dinner - YUMMO!

I just wanted to share my dinner with you guys. Wow, was it good. And easy to eat for a bandster. I don't know why I didn't do this sooner! 

We had chicken in garlic cream sauce over cauli-rice, garlicky green beans, and a romaine salad (no photo).  The cauli-rice did NOT taste like cauliflower and was a great substitute for rice. I am in HEAVEN with this discovery, as I've really not eaten much rice in the last 16 or so months.

Recipes

Cauli-Rice

1/2 head fresh cauliflower

Pat of butter

1. Cut the cauliflower into florets

2. Add the florets to food processor with shredding blade on.

3. Add the riced cauliflower to microwave safe bowl.

4. Microwave for 3 minutes, stop and stir the rice every 1 minute.

5. Add a pat of butter, and enjoy!

Yields about 2 cups of cauli-rice

Garlicky Green Beans

3lbs fresh green beans

1 stick butter 

1 t. garlic salt 

Fresh cracked pepper 

1 Lg onion, diced 

2-4 cloves fresh garlic, pressed 

Clean beans and snap into 1-2 inch segments. Boil in large pan until just cooked through. 

In large sauce pan melt butter. Add garlic salt, pepper, and onions. Cook over med heat until carmelized. Add drained cooked green beans. Cook over med heat for about 15 min letting beans carmalize a bit.

Chicken in Garlic Cream Sauce

1 lb chicken breast, cut in bite-size chunks

4 oz. cream cheese 

1/4 cup heavy cream 

1 tbsp chives, fresh or dried 

1/2 tbsp parsley, fresh or dried 

1.5 cloves garlic, minced 

1/2 tsp salt 

1/4 tsp ground black pepper 

2 tbsp butter 

Fry garlic in butter until golden, then add chicken to pan and fry until done. Stir in cream cheese and cream until smooth, then add herbs and seasoning to taste. Add chicken back in, cover, and allow to cook on low for about 15 minutes. Serve over cauli-rice.

Vacation...All I ever wanted!

We took our first vacation in more than a year over the weekend. It was only 3 days and we stayed at my parents' place (a fifth wheel), so not a VACATION-vacation, but away from the hustle and bustle of life at least. We swam and swam and soaked in the hot tubs and went to the beach and ate good food and got lots of sun. It was wonderful.

And now I'm back and on Atkins. 16 hours in, and I am doing good. HAHAHAHA

I had coffee with heavy cream and splenda for breakfast. Lunch was two deviled eggs and six homemade pepper poppers (half of a mini sweet pepper stuffed with cream cheese and wrapped with bacon). Snack was a few cheese crisps (microwaved cheese) with some guacamole. Dinner is chicken chunks in a garlic cream sauce served over riced cauliflower, green beans, and a side salad (with blue cheese and bacon - yum!). If I need a snack tonight, it'll either be homemade hot cocoa (made with cream) or a cup of coffee. DH is doing it with me, too.

Oh, guess what? He officially weighs two pounds more than me, so I have to lose as fast as him! The bummer is I don't know what the scale was doing when I thought I was back to my lowest, but I weighed 263.8 lbs this morning. That's almost 14 lbs up from my lowest! Gulp. Anyhow, I will pretend about 6 lbs of it is water weight, so I need to lose 8 real lbs to get back to where I was in late September.

Anyhow, back to food. It's funny how many recipes I'm anxious to try. My fridge and freezer are jam-packed with food, and there's definitely more I want to make than I could possibly eat in probably a month! I'm hoping the variety and creativity of the recipes I've found will keep us motivated to keep with it. And I'm really hoping the weight flies off for the first few weeks.

You know how I am with goals, right? Well, I've sucked with them lately, but you know, I still like to set them, even if I forget them. (Anyone catch that reference?) So, my 18-month bandiversary is May 25, and our five-year wedding anniversary is May 27. May 27 is exactly 51 days from today. I'd really love to be at 232 lbs on that date, which is what I weighed the first time I joined Weight Watchers, but that would be almost 32 lbs lost in 51 days. Don't think that is gonna happen. 234 lbs would also be nice, as that would be 140 lbs lost, but again that would be 30 lbs lost in 51 days, which also is not gonna happen. Sooooo, I guess  will settle for under 240 lbs. That would be 24 lbs lost in 51 days. Still a stretch, but definitely doable.

So, with that, I guess I'll go prep dinner and clean something in this house. I feel like all I ever do is clean, and all I ever see is messes. I really, really need a job! Speaking of, keep your fingers crossed - I had two interviews last Thursday, including a second interview with a job I'd really like to be offered. Thanks!